Great piece. And it makes a really important point I think: so much writing on the smartphone says "it's really bad for you and you should cut down". Bad news - we aren't that disciplined or that smart. We need rules, like The Masters.
We need to underestimate ourselves. We are kids in the face of the phone. I devote two hours of my day to intentional mental silence to fight the phone. I do it on the commute because that's where it fits in my day. And I wear a blue high vis vest saying "Phone Free Commute" to enforce it via social commitment. It's ridiculous but it works. I'm treating myself as a kid (I'm a midlife crisis man, and I don't care :-)). I'd never stop doing it - the digital dementia you describe receded fully after a few weeks, and I'm now three months in. The prize is just incredible.
I'm not saying everyone needs to wear a blue high vis vest. But we are going to need to treat ourselves like kids. Use a little imagination. Or hardcore rules. Like The Masters.
Most of my running friends are shocked I don't take my phone when I run. There are a few exceptions, of course, in the desert on a LR for safety. I run to be free!
Brad, as always, your analysis is spot on. I feel more optimistic as I see more scientific data being published on this issue. Once that starts happening, attitudes will change. Look at the behavior around alcohol. As people are made aware of the dangers of alcohol, drinking has begun to drop precipitously. I hope that as more data identifies the dangers of phone addiction, it will provide the impetus for the same type of behavior change. (or maybe I'm just a hopeless optimist.)
This goes the same as how can the other person on the table feel connected if we are constantly picking up phone after every 5/10 minutes. We say we want to spend time with our children even though I am not married but the point is that we say and sit around them and after a bit of time gets disconnected.
The greatest gift a person can give to another is their time with utmost presence felt to the other person. They should feel like they are seen.
Being totally present when being around your loved ones is one of the greatest form of gesture. But being totally present should not be the goal, rather a byproduct of being totally immersed in with the people and about peaks & valleys about each other's lives and showing gratitude to each other. It should be somewhat default to be around with them with total presence on all facets- be it physically, mentally and emotionally. Then only the other person can feel connected and convey things to you.
We as humans are 24*7 on air. We need to be totally present & not keep going on total automation. As Ellen Langer lays emphasizes on the importance & significance of Mindfulness over the last 4-5 decades. I have read Lisa Feldman Barret's book and listened to her on a lot of podcasts as well getting insights about how our emotions are formed and how it gets shown in the present and future because of the past experiences.
Very informative and thought provoking article. The book (page flipping type) I am reading right now and throughly enjoying is "The Way of Excellence".
The digital device is here to stay, but what purpose does it have in the moment? Right now I'm typing a comment after reading this article, on my run it's my camera and emergency contact, and sometimes it is fluff. But the point is mindful use.
In regards to phone in classrooms, there, but not in use such as in a backpack. Because of the rise in mass school shootings, a phone can signal for help, give exact location, and let parents know child is okay. Tumbler Ridge school mass shooting in BC, Canada is a recent example.
The phone issue is really a training issue. Attention goes where it has been conditioned to go, and most of us have accidentally trained for distraction with Olympic-level consistency. The “masters” lesson is useful because mastery always requires protecting the conditions that make depth possible.
I have a little phone safe myself to help me stay on task. It's this clunky calculator looking thing where you trap your phone inside and set a timer for how long you want the phone to be locked. There is a noticeable difference between not using your phone and knowing you can't use it. A mental relief and better focus, free from the brain rot you describe.
Great piece. And it makes a really important point I think: so much writing on the smartphone says "it's really bad for you and you should cut down". Bad news - we aren't that disciplined or that smart. We need rules, like The Masters.
We need to underestimate ourselves. We are kids in the face of the phone. I devote two hours of my day to intentional mental silence to fight the phone. I do it on the commute because that's where it fits in my day. And I wear a blue high vis vest saying "Phone Free Commute" to enforce it via social commitment. It's ridiculous but it works. I'm treating myself as a kid (I'm a midlife crisis man, and I don't care :-)). I'd never stop doing it - the digital dementia you describe receded fully after a few weeks, and I'm now three months in. The prize is just incredible.
I'm not saying everyone needs to wear a blue high vis vest. But we are going to need to treat ourselves like kids. Use a little imagination. Or hardcore rules. Like The Masters.
Thanks for sharing your story! I’m so glad you found a rule and commitment device that works for you.
Thank you! It's pretty stupid I know, but literally anything is worth it to properly break the 24/7 phone use cycle.
Excellent
subscribe for a subscribe! lets build community!
Most of my running friends are shocked I don't take my phone when I run. There are a few exceptions, of course, in the desert on a LR for safety. I run to be free!
Brad, as always, your analysis is spot on. I feel more optimistic as I see more scientific data being published on this issue. Once that starts happening, attitudes will change. Look at the behavior around alcohol. As people are made aware of the dangers of alcohol, drinking has begun to drop precipitously. I hope that as more data identifies the dangers of phone addiction, it will provide the impetus for the same type of behavior change. (or maybe I'm just a hopeless optimist.)
This goes the same as how can the other person on the table feel connected if we are constantly picking up phone after every 5/10 minutes. We say we want to spend time with our children even though I am not married but the point is that we say and sit around them and after a bit of time gets disconnected.
The greatest gift a person can give to another is their time with utmost presence felt to the other person. They should feel like they are seen.
Being totally present when being around your loved ones is one of the greatest form of gesture. But being totally present should not be the goal, rather a byproduct of being totally immersed in with the people and about peaks & valleys about each other's lives and showing gratitude to each other. It should be somewhat default to be around with them with total presence on all facets- be it physically, mentally and emotionally. Then only the other person can feel connected and convey things to you.
We as humans are 24*7 on air. We need to be totally present & not keep going on total automation. As Ellen Langer lays emphasizes on the importance & significance of Mindfulness over the last 4-5 decades. I have read Lisa Feldman Barret's book and listened to her on a lot of podcasts as well getting insights about how our emotions are formed and how it gets shown in the present and future because of the past experiences.
I am!! Even more than I thought I would.
Very informative and thought provoking article. The book (page flipping type) I am reading right now and throughly enjoying is "The Way of Excellence".
The digital device is here to stay, but what purpose does it have in the moment? Right now I'm typing a comment after reading this article, on my run it's my camera and emergency contact, and sometimes it is fluff. But the point is mindful use.
In regards to phone in classrooms, there, but not in use such as in a backpack. Because of the rise in mass school shootings, a phone can signal for help, give exact location, and let parents know child is okay. Tumbler Ridge school mass shooting in BC, Canada is a recent example.
I hope you’re enjoying TWoE!
The phone issue is really a training issue. Attention goes where it has been conditioned to go, and most of us have accidentally trained for distraction with Olympic-level consistency. The “masters” lesson is useful because mastery always requires protecting the conditions that make depth possible.
I have a little phone safe myself to help me stay on task. It's this clunky calculator looking thing where you trap your phone inside and set a timer for how long you want the phone to be locked. There is a noticeable difference between not using your phone and knowing you can't use it. A mental relief and better focus, free from the brain rot you describe.
Thank you for clearly and unambiguously stating what we all know, but many of us, me included, fail to correct.
Simple — but simple doesn’t mean easy.